Love of unknown

It was an immoral rain yesterday. Unyielding, uncompromising, unrelenting.
A tyrant!

I came out of a shop, near my place and was blinded by nothing in sight but the downpour
I contemplated on my next move

I could go back and wait for the rain to abate.
But the impatient me, and the beauty loving me trashed this idea and decided to get soaked and walk till home.

But this city of Bangalore is not so much for such adventurers. It does not entertain whimsical wishes like these on unconventional days like this one.

Cos there were pools of water on both sides of the road, with just a thin pathway visible right in the center of the road.
I hopped onto that center patch of visible road and started walking on it. SO, I was waling right in the middle of a busy road

But the traffic behind me started getting mad. I continued snootily giving deaf ear to all of them, but after a while the nasty looks I got from all around made me relent.

I again had 2 options. I could go back and wait under any of the shelters around me, or step on to my left, where an unknown pile of dirt, ditch awaited me

For someone who looks out for dust in every nook and corner, who uses hand gloves when any washing has to be done, who has to wipe or dust any place she touches..the 2nd option was blasphemous

But I have no idea why, I chose the 2nd one.
I clenched my teeth, asked my heart and mind to stop for a second and without paying heed to any of my other senses, put my feet into that pool

I had an exhilarating experience of surrendering to the unknown , to the pull of a whirlwind I have never experienced
I kept walking, unaware of what was hitting my feet..and totally not bothered.

Cos I knew I was going home
And everything will be taken care of, once I am there

While I kept walking, a mad wish came to my mind..I wished I could do the same in life.
And for a second I thought it might be as easy as this.

Just plunge in, and get blown away to smithereens, by inexplicable emotions and feelings I have never found or searched within me

The unwanted can become the wanted..if they are the unknowns and the paradoxes

I am for keeps

I am in Gurgaon - late in the night..a Saturday night
Smell of smoke in the air
I am in a bar, a happening one, as per the standards

But I dint quite enjoy anything inside the bar  till now, I was just trying to sway to my moods, which dint uplift
I had a few beer mugs, but then I am a pro and a few beer mugs do nothing for me now

But suddenly, while I waited for people to finish what they were doing, I sat on the bench outside
Half drunk, half asleep, I looked up

There it was, my moon..I looked around..

There were women, head bent while they text-ed away to someone
Their faces convoluted in some fake misery, over a false love, over an emotion they so wanted in life, that they resorted to faking

I looked up again at the moon, inhaled the smoke, it gave me a high which the beer mugs could now
I was drowning in a sense of deja vu..I was one of those women sometime
Drunk, texting and madly in love..with someone..or with myself?

I could inhale the smoke the whole night and not budge
I was falling in love again...with something..someone..or the moment
Nostalgia of some kind hit me strong

Delhi of some other time floated in front of me

I dont know what I remembered, who I recalled, but I remember remembering...
That I am for keeps..that who belongs to me can never get away from me