Specially in a train, she prefers no other business than reading and eventually sleeping. Sleeping does not come easy, but she waits for it. Till then she reads, as if reading is the last thread to hold on to, in life.
She abhors speaking to anyone while traveling. She likes being alone in her journey. All puns intended.
"Get the F*** out of here" - She suddenly hears this, from someone sitting right in front of her. It sounded like a very young guy. 22-23 maybe.
She usually hates people using the F word in front of a woman, so she buried herself deeper in her book, and wished the night came soon and she could go off to sleep and dint have to bear any small talk from anyone.
She is a bit of a recluse
"Are you working with Satyam?" - Its the same young guy's voice, but seems like its directed towards her.
She very reluctantly raises her head from her book, hoping its not for her.
But he is looking directly at her, and she cant but notice that he is strikingly good looking.
"Yes" - is her reply
She has learnt one thing in her life, about how to be around strangers(read it men).
- Do not say much, to show that they can ask you more and get comfortable with you.
- But at the same time, do not show disdain and aloofness, cos that arouses more dangerous and unwonted behavior from them, which she did not want to deal with.
So a "Yes" is what she thought appropriate and what she could muster.
He found it little wired that she dint even bother to know why and how he guessed that.
"Would you not like to know how I guessed that?" - He probed.
She quizzically looked at him, without saying anything
"Its the bag with the company's logo next to you. I was surprised when you said just a Yes. I felt that you looked the kind who would sarcastically say : Cant you see the bag? But looks like you don't bother" - He added with a smile.
She noticed he looked adorably vulnerable with that smile.Very unaware of its effect too
She then mentally tried to form an image of her, as to how she appeared to him at this moment.
She was in her Capri, and a t-shirt. Her hair was tied in a french braid. There was no make-up on, as it is with her in train journeys.
She does not expect much action and tries to prevent it too.
But this guy was different, he intruded without a sign of encouragement
People told her that she looked good with her hair loose.
She un-knowingly loosened her hair, and tilted her head in a way which gave the best profile shot of hers. The dimple shown generously and a soft jawline.
But the very next moment she was irritated with herself, for such a display of attention seeking behavior from her side
She pulled her hair back in a stern bun again, and slumped her head in the most ungracious way. Hoping to combat all her earlier efforts to look attractive.
She never thought herself to be someone who needed to seek attention from a man and this behavior of hers put her in a bad light, not to anyone but to herself and she needed to obliterate that.
She threw a glance his way, just to be assured that he was not noticing any of these changes.
But to her dismay she found him staring at her, not like a lecherous guy ogling at a woman but as someone who was trying to figure her out
And she knew the exact thoughts that might be going in his mind..
"God, She is so mysterious!"
She knew thats the impression she made on most people, in the very first meeting.
She could never fathom what men felt was mysterious about her? They thought she is reticent, and does not like to mix with people
But did they know she was always an amalgam of confusion, who was so caught in her own mesh of thoughts, that others cease to exist for her at times.
Is this what they they found mystifying?
But they dint know if something dint consume her, it dint interest her.
If she did not find a reason to laugh at their banal jokes, she would give back a stare, which they found profound?
She liked men in control, but they moment they tried controlling her, she would slip away..was that dis-concerting?
She could love a song to bits, yet hate it to its core..both together..did that make her inaccessible?
She dint know the answers, yet she knew people found her mysterious
Which made her shiver within, what is it that they found unfathomable, when she could get herself?
Was the inaccessible in her, her strength?
She was quite sure of such thoughts in his mind
YET, she did not know ONE thing
He knew exactly what was going on in her mind.
He knew she was wondering what makes her mysterious, he knew she could not grasp her own attractiveness
Yet there he was..
Falling in an abyss..
He was reaching out to his guts to stop himself from touching her
He was reasoning with his impulse to hate the same things which seemed so endearing to him
He was bewitched byan amalgam of confusion....for no reason explainable to her or to him
He was falling for her je ne sais quoi
10 comments:
There is that other side of the coin; if you are attracted to a mystery, something indefinable, then as soon as that mystery is solved, it's all over. It is difficult to accept the usual behind the mystery.
Syed - Now now, that such a pessimistic way of looking at it. I do that too though
Cant mystery continue forever? I have seen couple married for 25 years yet engrossed in themselves. A part of her, he can never grasp and vice versa
I don't know what exactly that guy the felt but the girl surely desired to be admired, her beauty to be decoded and her mystery to be unravelled though she resisted the very effort externally.
Lovely words
<3
Sh@s - you could be right. But then, thats the way she is maybe
Blahblaholic - Thanks :)
This 'engrossed in themselves' is getting used to each other; has nothing to do with any myatery whatsoever.
Syed - Might be. But some mystery can continue. Not on the face kind or the of the initial days, but hidden somewhere to continue the pull towards each other
Dil ke khush rakhne ko 'Ghalib' ye khayal achcha hai.
The universe itself is a great mystery and there is no sign whatsoever that it will be demystified any sooner. Yes, I believe a mystery worthy enough to be called so can outlast reason and secure its place deep within the human heart. When put to the context of the so-called love business, it eventually comes to be felt as 'affection' :) Brilliant post. Mind-unlocking.
Destiny's child - Thank you and your comment itself is like a poem :)
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