We have these mini-worlds inside this world. Our place.
However much they love you, however much you want them to stay..they will eventually go back to "their home"..as they define it.
A few days back, my sister left my 1 year nephew to stay with me for 3-4 hours while she had a party to attend. And after she took him home, I dint feel much about his absence till I entered my room.
The cream bottle he was playing with was lying on the bed, that plug of my night-lamp he was fiddling with and trying to put in the socket, was thrown exactly the same way as he had left it
And I felt a strange pang in the heart..of missing something, of missing someone..which I never felt in a long time. It was just for a few moments before sleep devoured me...
But it felt strange..cos I believe I have stopped feeling anything close to it in ages.
As you embrace loneliness, your own company..bit by bit people seem to abandon you..they do care for you, they do bother about you but they are not interested in your life...cos you have not adorned it with enough people, with spices of life, with things which others call "life"
And one day you realise that the only person interested in your own life is just you.
People have no time to hear..forget listening!
They just talk..talk talk talk..about their lives, their friends..the bitchy sis in law..the tiring mother in law...their office..their bosses..their work..their..their their..
What is it that makes people talk so much, sometimes obsessively? Do they like the ring of their own sound filling the world? Does it make them feel important?
They ask you questions and then give the answers themselves,as if they want to minimise hearing another's voice
There is this girl in office who keeps blabbering insane stuff to everyone around. She is in HR so daily she is near our bay, talking crap..displaying silly humour and just speaking..for the sake of speaking.
I wonder if she ever realises she is making a fool of herself, cos I know people sneer behind her
Why cant people just be silent at times, listen to other sounds in the world..cant they wait for the other to finish the sentence before they barge in..cant they understand that all want to be heard?
If you have stories in your life..others have too..and its listening which makes things more interesting..not all the talking
These unnecessary sounds around me sometimes unnerve
So much so that some days I decide to be silent, not a word..as if to punish the world for not being the way I would have liked it to be.
Makes me wonder what happens to all those moments of my life which is going unnoticed..unappreciated..unloved
And other times I move around with a smug feeling..of having this secret world inside me..that world which noone can touch..that world noone has any clue about..I move around protecting my sacred secret...the colours of me!
6 comments:
Makes me wonder what happens to all those moments of my life which is going unnoticed..unappreciated..unloved...... Wish i had known some more adjectives, so that i would be able to tell you how awesome that sentence is.
Do smile and feel appreciated when you read this.
Kabir
@Kabir - Thanks. Any heart felt appreciation means a lot
"As you embrace loneliness, your own company..bit by bit people seem to abandon you"
I so second with this...I would not say that I have abandoned myself completely from the world around...but now I don't feel this need to have someone to share my things with. I was expecting a lot from the people...yes they do care...but it doesn't matter now.
But, there still come some moments when I become weak...waiting for the day when these weak moments actually become by strong points...and I can see this time coming very soon!
I loved this write-up of yours!!
@Mansi - Thank you. We are humans and we will have weak moments. I feel our strength lies in understanding and accepting them. There are things which cant fight and when its not necessary to put up a face to the world is when you feel really strong
I love this writing of yours, Rajita, I relate to it, so much so that i would have liked to tag this piece of expression.
Rajita, Im sure, u have perfectly spoken out the thoughts of many people, and i feel people who dont voice much in person, do use their blogs to do the same..
I do.
Yes the mini worlds, that people retire to abandoning us bit by bit..
In the end they'll always have 'other obligations'.. :)
@Mysh - Thats true! But we have our own worlds, dont we? How is that less than theirs..I sometimes cherish my own exclusive world more than anythign else
Post a Comment